I just talked to my cousin today and I remembered how each pregnant woman has her own worst fear. For some it is that the shoulders will get stuck. For some it is tearing. Tearing was my worst fear until my yoga teacher said something in class one day. She said that vaginal tissue is much like mouth tissue in that is the fastest healing in the body. If you have ever had a cut in your mouth you know that it heals in almost a day and leaves no trace. That gave me great relief. I did end up tearing, but never felt it. Thanks to a good sewing job (that is key) and 40 days taking it easy at home, I was completely healed by my 6 week appointment. By that I don't mean I was about to have sex or use a tampon, but it didn't hurt when my midwife stuck her fingers in there and used gentle pressure on the north, south, east and west coordinates to see if I had any discomfort.
"Does this hurt? Does this hurt? Does this hurt? Does this hurt?" she asked.
My replay was "No, but it is freaking me out."
I would love to hear how you cleared your pet fears or how they turned out not to be a big deal. This is for you Wendy. xoxo
I must say my biggest fear with my son was the 'pushing' part of labor. #1 - I had heard many horror stories of people pushing for hours on end. #2 - we knew that my son was fairly large, especially for a first baby (he was born at 10 lbs!) And #3 - I did NOT want to push for hours on end and then him get stuck and having to have a c-section (that's what happened to my mom with me - I was also a 10 lb baby.) So when the pushing part came I was absolutely TERRIFIED. I started pushing and at about my 5th push I remember thinking "there is no way I can do this for much longer!" (I had already labored long and hard before the pushing came) and then on the 6th push the doc said "Alright- one more push and we'll have a baby!" I sat up and said "Really?!?" And I pushed and out he came! 10 pound baby in 7 pushes! And my daughter (who came 3 years later) was an 8 lb baby in 2 pushes. I guess my body was made to birth large babies... I later learned my biggest fear shouldn't be the pushing - it should have been the epidural!! (but that's another story...) :)
ReplyDeleteI had a horrible tear that did NOT heal well- so what wasn't a fear the first time is a huge fear this time around. I wish I knew how to clear my mind of it.
ReplyDeleteI think my biggest fear is that I would labor endlessly and Olive would not make any progress. I was very worried that I'd be in labor for 15-20 hours and still be at four centimeters. I think that still worries me. I think because I don't know what I'd do in that situation. Would I keep laboring? Would I give in to the doctor for an c-section? Would I hold my own, only to discover that something was keeping the baby from being born vaginally (too short an umbilical cord, the cord wrapped around the neck, etc).
ReplyDeleteWith my 2nd two births my biggest fear was I would need an emergency cesarean like I had with my 1st. I think for me hypnosis helped me deal with that fear. Affirmations helped as well. If I was to get pregnant again, I would use EFT also to help with my fears.
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